An Apology

There was a fault on the line.

We're sorry for the delay
and for any inconvenience caused
or any offence.
None was meant

We're sorry for that war

50 - 60 years ago
it wasn't our fault but we're sorry anyway
and for any offence or inconvenience.
None was meant

On behalf of anyone who ever did anything

that caused offense or inconvenience,
we are so very sorry

That day it rained when the sun was supposed to shine
and for that spelling mistake,
that wrong turn and that spilt beer
all over your new shirt,
we are all so very sorry
for any offense that was caused or any inconvenience.
None was meant

For that blunt remark and lack of sympathy thereof,

my ignorance of the full facts of the situation notwithstanding,
I would like to apologise for any offense that was caused
and for any inconvenience.
None was meant

For that tramp that spoilt your view

of the nice shop window,
and the surly shop assistant
who just didn't seem to care.
That funny smell on the bus that time
(oh the day was going so well wasn't it),
and for that pothole
and all that bad news on the telly

On behalf of us all
please take care when leaving the train/bus/plane
and on that ladder,
and may we take this opportunity to wish you well
on your journey through life
and once again
to apologise
for any inconvenience that has been caused
and for any offense.

None was meant