Newsflash

From the East Grinstead Echo

Notorious burglar Vince ‘The Cat’ Lifter was arrested on Monday morning when a security guard found him wedged in the ventilation shaft in Carpet World, where it turned out he had been all weekend. He had become stuck trying to break through into the Cash Converters next door after forgetting to make allowances for his backpack.

Vince had only recently been released from prison after serving two years for the theft of a pair of £1000 hand-made leather trousers belonging to a well-known politician. In his defence he claimed that he was going to sell them and redistribute the money to the local homeless. He was only caught because the politician who owned the trousers was wearing them at the time.

Born in East Grinstead as Richard Lifter, he changed his name by deed poll to Vince (after a beloved uncle) as he felt Dick Lifter created entirely the wrong impression for one embarking on a serious life of crime.

Vince claimed there is no truth in the rumour that he was caught on purpose as he had become rather fond of the prison chaplain.