Come in, it's lovely to see you. Pull up a cushion and stay as long as you like.

Wednesday, 29 May 2013

The Usual Script (well almost)

We regret to inform you
on this occasion
you have been unsuccessful
in your application

We will keep your details
on file in case
another suitable vacancy arises

We hope that makes you feel
a little better
even though we both know
nothing will ever come of it
and you won't hear from us again

At least we didn't keep you waiting
on hold for half an hour
while we tried to transfer you
to the correct department

or got you pressing
lots of buttons
until you thought you were finally through
and then we cut you off anyway

We have to have some way
to amuse ourselves
and we did reply
unlike most employers nowadays

Small comfort we know
because you didn't get the job
but we're only trying to make the most
of a bad situation

We wish you well
for your future success
even though you're thinking that
it seems we couldn't care less...



  1. I really like this poem, Jonathan. It reminds me of a similar one I used to study with my students. Very zeitgeisty and relevant. Lots of people will relate to it in these times, I suspect.

    1. Thanks Annie I appreciate that. Been wondering for ages whether to post this but the latest 'rejection' pushed me over the edge!

  2. Made me chuckle and it's so true.